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Hot on the heels of Dan's Jehovahs Witness / Where's JJON thread ....

This morning, my mate 'Ev' ran a car back from Newmarket for me .... so this afteroon, when he was cadging for a lift down to Deptford, I thought well I can hardly refuse can I ...

Gets down to Deptford .. his brother wasn't in .. so off to his babymothers we go to say hello ...

Gets round there, she wasn't in (but her sister was) ...

Offers us some turkey and dumpling stew ... (which I politely declined but Ev yummed a bowl up) ..

Then she says to Ev ... 'Has he been to church lately .... eh?? (My ears pricked up then alright!)

'Nah' he says (quietly) .... 'Nah .. not really ... '

Then she started gong on about how we were good guys but needed to be saved ... (I thinks to myself ... I can see where this is heading) ...

Anyway, next thing, Ev focs off out the kitchen and foccing leaves me being preached at ..

'Do you belive in God' she says?

Erm .. I'm not sure ..

'oh' she says, 'I've always believed but I was born again in 2002'

Made the fatal mistake of asking what she meant ... :help

Ev reappears 5 minutes later and saved me .. (she was reading John (him again! that little foccer gets everywhere) Chapter 3 to me .... no joke ...

She then says ... shall we have a little prayer together ..

'Erm, I'm a bit late as it is' says I ...

'It won't take long' she says .....

Then she's sat there, holding mine and Ev's hand ... rambling away .. 'save these young men from the inner city' :lol ..

THEN, just as the prayer was coming to an end ... she starts singing Amazing Grace .. (and says sing with me!!) ... Ev warbled away .. but foc that, i was biting my tongue pissing myself trying not to laugh ... scared to look at Ev cos I'd crack up ....

Foccinel, I thought Jeremy Beadle was gonna pop up with a camera and say it was a pisstake or summit ...

Anyway, she then blags a lift from us from Deptfprd to Brockley .... (then she gets the address wrong .. so, still we take her on and on ... and she's in the back of the car .... rambling away .. .'Thank you God .. Father, you're so patient, Amen! The lord is good ... Thank you for this lord!'

Foccinel, I felt like saying .. it ain't foccing God that's giving you a lift love .. it's ME!!!

Was I right to try and not laugh though? .. foccinel, I was biting my tongue proper stylee trying not to :rollin
 

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It may have been rude to laugh but (from employing a Born Again Christian) they are fairly thick skinned when it comes to their faith and laughing or mocking them would only make them work harder to proselytize you. Probably made a good escape there.
 

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but foc that, i was biting my tongue pissing myself trying not to laugh ... scared to look at Ev cos I'd crack up ....
Mate, I'd have been cracking up if I'd been there :lol And don't feel bad about it either, you don't ram your beliefs (the Lord KFC for example :lol ) down other peoples' throats so they shouldn't do the same to others.

Didn't realise my daughter was standing behind me and started laughing at the above quote, she starts reading it "but...foc..." :eek :( :stop :bad

:rollin
 

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JJON said:
you don't ram your beliefs (the Lord KFC for example :lol ) down other peoples' throats



"the Lord KFC"...now there is a religion one could sink one's teeth into! :lick :lick :lick
 

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Had the same issues with a guy who lived in the same B & B with me. He was constantly trying to 'convert' me. Frightened the holy crap out of him when I pulled out my Tarot Cards and asked him if he wanted a reading :devil
 

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Landlady of a pub near Winchester where I delivered to asked a Jehova's witness to stop preaching to her customers in the Pub garden after people complained. He didn't and five minutes later she wrapped a chair around his head.He stopped!
 
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